There is no way, I’m that old?

Well I am approaching 60! I can not believe I just typed it. And, it sounds worse when you say it, but inside I don’t really feel that old. The same thoughts that I had when I was in my 20’s are not that far from how I feel today. My feelings and sense of humor are just as warped and immature. Oh no, maybe I will never grow up. How frightening!

One of the ways I recognize that I am aging is when I pull up to a light and look at the car next to me and think, “Hey, should that twelve year old be driving?” Or the couple with a toddler in the food store, who can’t possibly be the parents, because they look like teenagers. Why do they look so young? Does your brain develop an age blocker after you turn 50?

And I can’t seem to grasp the age of my own child. Why is it so difficult to see your child as an adult? In my heart, I realize that he’s graduated college, has a great job and lives in his own apartment. However, he appears at my house and I see the little boy enter and become Mommy. The son has tried to let me down easy, “Mom, I hate to break this to you but I’m 31.” Is the age blocker part of this situation as well?

His age sends my brain into overdrive, “What?” “How is that possible?” “Where did the years go?” I remember bringing him home from the hospital and the many sleepless nights. The thoughts of “will he still be using his pacifier or wearing a diaper as he walks down the aisle?” Those years that you prayed for the night to come just so you could have some down time. What I would give for some of those days back again!

Lately, my mother’s words of wisdom come to mind so often, I can hear her say, “Let him be little for as long as possible, because he’ll grow up before you know it.”and the “Don’t wish your life away” and the my favorite, “I don’t care how old you are, you will always be my baby!” So, if in your life, you are in that Mom phase, take my mother’s advice, because truer words were never spoken.

And if you are on the other side of the parenthood pathway, will the brain age blocker work on my own age too?

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